How Neil deGrasse Tyson will save America

                                      Neil deGrasse Tyson - now here's a guy with all the answers.

Plato submit that "those who are too smart to engage in politics are punished by being governed by those who are dumber." Astrophysicist Neil deGrasse Tyson illuminates a similar situation in America’s current political climate, but shows that we are all the ones being punished.

Neil (as I familiarly refer to him) is the director at the Hayden Planetarium, author, columnist, PBS host, and People’s Sexiest Astrophysicist Alive (clearly). He may also be one of the most inspiring and insightful voices of our generation.

His message?  To reestablish America’s progressive innovative culture, and invest in our economy by investing in NASA.

In an interview with Bill Maher last year, Neil explained that half of congress states their profession as law, with a few businessmen mixed in.  Even from a young age he questioned “where are the scientists? Where are the engineers?”

Of law, he states “the act of arguing and not agreeing seems to be fundamental to that profession, and congress is half that profession.”  Herein lays a fundamental indicator of our current predicament. In a 2010 interview with NPR's Linda Holmes he expressed that "you can't have people making decisions about the future of the world who are scientifically illiterate”. And he wasn’t just referring to politicians themselves, but the general public who is responsible for voting them in.

Neil is accustomed to putting things into a cosmic perspective, so it’s understandable that he is able to imagine the systemic overhauls needed to assuage our woes. From the way we stifle our children’s’ scientific curiosity to our ineffective policy and budgeting, the problem is the culture. We have collectively decided to stop investing in our excellence and accept mediocrity.

Our country seems to be facing too many problems to count these days, and we apply the same solution across the board. We throw money at each issue directly. We try to fix things one at a time.

Neil declares that “by my read of history, by my read of human behavior, by my read of government funding streams, these efforts amount to no more than Band-Aids on sores that have opened up in our society caused by a much deeper absence – the absence of an innovation culture.”

Innovation and space exploration are “the foundations of tomorrow’s economy” and we should learn to value this whether or not we’re a scientist or technologist.

NASA was founded on the fear revolving around Sputnik, but threat of war shouldn’t be the driver for our development. In the end "we reaped the benefits of economic growth because we had people who wanted to become scientists and engineers, who are the people who enable tomorrow to come today.”

Despite their recent budget cuts, Neil proposes that NASA’s budget be doubled. Although this is a hard sell in our current fiscal condition, it sounds reasonable when juxtaposed against the two-year U.S. military budget which exceeds the entirety of NASA’s half-century budget.

Washington seems to have trouble comprehending the fact that their return on investment would come in the form of innovation and technological advancement. By attempting to draw America and her policy-makers away from their fixation with immediate gratification, we can attempt to look towards a future where we live up to the type of greatness we ourselves once defined.

Nothing freaky, please

This article was published in Willamette University's The Collegian, March 14, 2012

Most of the recent women’s health debate concerns a detail of The Affordable Care Act (which passed), and the Republicans’ attempt to shoot it down (which failed). All this fuss is over a sensible contraception rule which is hardly a significant change in standing law. The Equal Opportunity Employment Commission already ruled in 2000 that failure to provide contraception coverage violates the 1978 Pregnancy Discrimination Act. Polls also show that the majority of voters, even Catholic voters, are in favor of Obama’s measure.

So given Rush Limbaugh’s apparently minimal impact on policy and public opinion, what are the effects of his psycho misogynistic remarks about Sandra Fluke?

The media storm that followed was shocking considering these comments were made by a man notorious for hyperbolic, foundationless, and insulting claims. How can we allow ourselves to be so offended by someone who is clearly insane? And then there’s the feminist movement, so afraid to take a real stand that they’re only emphasizing the non-sexual importance of contraceptives.

I don’t care to defend Fluke as a non-slut. Rather than implying that having sex somehow devalues a woman’s insight, we should be clarifying that contraceptive coverage is a basic healthcare right despite a woman’s sex life.

Our sexuality is clearly being politicized, and one danger of our current defense is it perpetuates a culture of shame. For young women in conservative and religious environments we should not only ensure that their care is covered, but that they won’t be too ashamed or embarrassed to take advantage of it.

So must we all become nymphomaniacal sex-machines for this message to be effective? No.

If the conversation is about our rights, we needn’t discuss to what degree we are sexual beings. Whether we be more prudent or promiscuous, as sexually active women we assume nearly all the risk associated with each sexual encounter. A call to solidarity among sluts doesn’t make this fact anymore obvious to the world.  

We should acknowledge that we enjoy sex for many reasons. However, as healthy and important embracing our sexuality is it has little influence on the policies that affect it. We also cannot generalize our sexuality or advocate promiscuity as a way to disarm our opposition’s offense.

It’s ignorant and beside the point. We can do better.

Clearly we should try to distance ourselves from our designated societal roles as non-sexual child-bearing vessels, but to win legal battles we can’t get distracted or defensive. We have an opportunity here to bring attention to our policies and the lack of women behind them. Women hold 17% of congressional seats, 4% are women of color (Uganda and Afghanistan literally have more women in their national legislatures), and we can no longer afford to entrust old white men with the wellbeing of our vaginas.

When we act either apologetic or radical we just look nuts and give the Rush Limbaugh’s of the world exactly what they want. We have plenty of reasonable arguments and we should stick to them. Don’t be dragged into rhetorical abstraction by a big fat nobody. Instead, use your voice to explain intelligently how “women’s health” is not only a women’s issue, and maybe then we can make some progress.

Here's to 364 Days of International White Male Days: A Message to the Broletariat

In lieu of the recently belated Black History Month, and current Women's History Month, white men the world over are starting to feel the neglect and bitter sting of BROpression. BUT WAIT! Did you know that despite the 364 days of the year unofficially devoted to celebrating men, International Mens Day is on November 19th?

So just try to wait it out boys. Soon enough it will be November, and in the midst of growing out your beards, if you're lucky, you could end up like these guys - happy just to be in an interracial testosterone pool, politely touching one another's shoulders (that guy in the back looks particularly happy).

I know that it's hard to be a dude these days, but don't forget, you guys do have plenty of support systems in place to assuage this constant stress. For instance, this site to tell quaint anecdotes celebrating conquests of blowjobs and sandwiches, or this official literature dictating your rules for social decorum. However, Stephen Colbert brings to light the true threat you are facing today:

Today's political landscape is now dominated by Black Men and White Women, while one group has been completely marginalized: the White Male. Sure, you can still find the occasional example of white men in power. A token 389 in Congress. A conciliatory seven or so on the Supreme Court. One in the White House.

Yes, men control only 485 out of the Fortune 500 companies, and a mere 3 branches of government, yet the systematic disenfranchising runs deeper everyday. It's predicted that within about a generation, white people will no longer compose the majority of the country. Slowly the white vision of meritocracy is disintegrating. The recession hit so many hardworking blue-collared men, that now according to author Tim Wise, they have been forced to share unemployment lines with "those people" - black and brown.

For the first time since the Great Depression, white Americans have been confronted with a level of economic insecurity that we're not used to. It's not so new for black and brown folks, but for white folks, this is something we haven't seen since the Depression.

But don't get defensive, take action. Economic insecurity is what Colby Bohannan says convinced him to form the "Former Majority Association for Equality." The association is awarding $500 scholarships to five deserving white men because they aren't eligible for scholarships reserved for women and minorities, he says. See? There is hope for you after all (even though unfortunately "Whiteness Studies" programs only exist in a very limited number of universities). Don't let the ladies and non-white people threaten your brotalitarian regime, take your jobs, question your worth, or deny your history. Because after all, "isn't the greatest victimization of all being robbed of your ability to be the victim?" So make everyday an opportunity to celebrate men, just don't ask me to join you at the keg party. 

                    Worry not. You shall brovercome.

International Women's Day: Inspiring Literacy

This year's theme for International Women's Day is Connecting Girls and Inspiring Futures.  To me it is very clear what young women need to succeed: education and literacy. There are currently 793 million illiterate people in the world, and nearly 2/3 are women and girls. Overall, worldwide education of girls in primary schools are increasing, but there remains a significant gap in the continued education of females across the globe. From the many refugee women working to create better lives for themselves, to the future policy makers of the world, literacy enables all women with the empowering gifts of confidence and security for our futures.

I would like to take this International Women's Day to thank my mother. She was never an avid reader but always expressed to me what it felt like to read a book and get lost in another world. She always had a fascination with words and language, but felt stifled by her inability to use them properly to express herself. With this she instilled in me a ceaseless curiosity and propensity to read and write, and to explore the potential of my knowledge. Your support of these personal endeavors of mine means more to me than you know. Thank you.

Retro Is So In! (And by Retro, I Mean Oppressing Women)

When I was young I wanted to grow up to be a housewife. I thought it meant being stylish, useful, and appreciated (because you know, June Cleaver was a real person). I watched I Love Lucy everyday, wherein Lucy was given an allowance by her husband and spanked over his knee when she "disobeyed." It's not that I thought this was OK (my mother has always been a very strong woman), but the sitcom still resonated. When I reached fourteen,  I had my first boyfriend who lived in a small apartment with his father. This provided me with the perfect opportunity to practice for my future and become highly domesticated. I cooked full meals then vacuumed in my heels and pearls while they watched the game. I was living the dream. Needless to say, we broke up just in time to realize that I should probably go to college (but I still brought the heels and pearls with me).

Apparently I was way ahead of the curve! Of course the show Mad Men is a hit, but British clothing company Madhouse has taken the "women are inferior and should do all the shit work" thing to a whole new level. Yesterday, Emma Barnett, editor at the Daily Telegraph, tweeted this photograph of her boyfriend's trousers from Madhouse:

Yes, the label not only provides typical clothing care information, but adds the advice to "GIVE IT TO YOUR WOMAN - IT'S HER JOB." Now, I still love ironing and baking pies and joke about being an oppressed housewife, but the thrill sort of dissipates for me the moment those contributions become expectations. The problem with this label (besides the fact that it's not really funny), is that our society still draws lines between what is "women's" and what is "men's" work. This can be seen in the lack of female CEO's and salary discrepancies between the genders. A recent study suggests that men and women may be sharing house work equally by the year 2050. But hey, at least we're on our way.

The problem with these trousers is what they're attempting to appeal to in their customers. This label plays on a primitive and fundamental expectation men have had of women. I don't believe that the majority of men still behave accordingly, but this marketing tactic by Madhouse does nothing but insult those who don't hold a sense of pride in their overcoming of oppression.

The Death of Robert Sherman

The beloved composer Robert Sherman passed away in London today. Together the Disney legend alongside his brother Richard were responsible for some of the most enduring songs of all time, among them the score of Mary Poppins, 'It's a Small World', Winnie the Pooh, and many many more.

Sherman's son said of his father that "his rule in writing songs was keep it singable, simple and sincere," a beautiful notion on the fact that in the simplest things can be found something universal. Also, that which "seems so simple is really very complex."

John Lasseter, of Pixar and Disney, once said "you cannot forget a Sherman brothers song for your life." I couldn't agree more.

My Favorite Vegan: In Support of Dennis Kucinich

My senior year in high-school I caucused for Dennis Kucinich. Even then I could recognize that he was a bit idealistic, and although I thought it was weird how insanely hot his wife was (and is), his positions of peace and equality still resonate today. 2008 didn't make him president, but now it's possible that 2012 will strip him of his House seat altogether. The recent redistricting of Ohio forces Kucinich into direct opposition with fellow Democrat Marcy Kaptur for the same seat. Kaptur's posse of celebrity endorsers include Tom Hanks and Bob Dole, while Shirley MacLaine and Sean Penn have been speaking out in support of Kucinich.

Super rich hip-hop mogul Russell Simmons has also been by Kucinich's side as he campaigns in Ohio in preparation for the Super Tuesday fight. Simmons writes an progressive but not un-true note on Kucinich's role in "The Battle for a Compassionate America":

While we watch the Republicans try to drag our country further and further to the Right, there is no other congress member who fights for a more compassionate America than Dennis. He wants everyone to have healthcare, affordable higher education and quality, sustainable jobs. During his entire political career, he has been a champion for peace and a powerful anti-war activist. He has shown compassion for the planet and all of the animals that inhabit it. He has stood up for the gay community and other under-served communities who often times are forgotten about on the House floor. He has always protected the rights of African-Americans and Latinos, even when it wasn't in his best "political interests." Dennis Kucinich is the People's Congressman. He cannot be bought and sold by any special interest group or any lobbying firm. He goes to work everyday for the people of his district and of this great nation. He has never taken for granted the rights he was given, as he has always fought for the rights of everyone.

Douchebags, Hipsters, and Bros

All of these things have meant the same thing to different people at different times in America. Today the term "douchebag" generally just means jerk, although it has gone through phases of much more specific connotations. Brian Palmer supplies an exposition on the history of the term "douche" as an insult in the repertoire of American vernacular. Here is a condensed timeline:

Novel Ninety Times Guilty (1939) includes a pimp named Jimmy Douchebag

Journal article about military slang (1946) definition: “a military misfit”

Book Plexus (1953) a male transvestite named Minnie Douchebag, a “crazy fairy who sings and plays the piano”

Cult hit Last Exit to Brooklyn (1964) the prostitute Tralala tells a man she’d “fuckim blind not like that fuckin douchebag he was with.”

Definition by the journal American Speech (1967) “an unattractive coed,” or, “by extension, any individual whom the speaker desires to denigrate.”

Taping of The Morton Downey Jr. Show (1987) an audience member taunted political activist Lyndon Larouche with the phrase “Larouche is a douche."

Anthrax song “Startin’ Up a Posse” (1991) lyrics “You’re a douche, you’re a douche, you’re a douche,” in apparent reference to record executives and/or government censors.

Brooklyn hipsters adopted the epithet to describe men with “gelled hair, fitted baseball cap, multiple pastel polo shirts with popped collars layered one atop another”

The insult turned back on them, as outsiders proposed calling a collection of skinny-jeans-wearing Brooklynites “a douchebag of hipsters.”

The Oxford English Dictionary defines douchebag, in its epithetical sense, as a “general term of disparagement,” or more specifically as “an unattractive or boring person.” Now clearly these definitions don't consider modern usage of the term, which to me just describes your average arrogant Entourage watching Broseph. Hearing someone called "douchebag" hardly brings to mind an image of what it physically is - a hygienic accessory for female genitalia. Now it's no surprise that the term evolved to be a general pejorative description of somebody that sucks. It's rare to hear a female referred to as a "douchebag", most likely because the term is intended to point out some sort of insufficiency, or even worse, immasculinity in a man. Clearly nothing is more insulting than being likened to a vaginal hose which actually increases bacterial infections. Yikes.

The Problem With the Evaluation Release: Both Sides Agree With It

"Education is inherently political" stated Richard Brody of The New Yorker last Friday. Brody goes on to note Socrates as the first successful challenger of the teachers' unions. Socrates seems to have set the tone for today's political agenda, wherein seemingly everyone but the teachers' union themselves were in favor of the public release of personal evaluation data on New York teachers.

The consensus that seems to have crystallized around the issue...is disturbing. It’s one of my political rules of thumb that, when liberals and conservatives advocate the same policy, it’s a harbinger of disaster, because they agree on a course of action for different reasons and neither faction poses serious questions regarding the other side’s logic.

The Liberal argument for linking teachers' pay to the performance of their students, is that it transcends racial and economic lines and provides greater opportunity for educational equality. The free-market rewards system and weakening of union benefits is what appeals to Conservatives. The result according to Brody:

And if the point of education really is the production of abstractly and measurably skillful people who don’t necessarily know anything in particular, it’s a vision (maybe a chilling one) that, at least, should be articulated for parents—and voters—to decide on. It may turn out that the substance and style of teaching and learning that they want schools to cultivate is exactly the kind that resists easy reduction to standardized testing. They may resist the paradox of an increasingly rigid and normative educational system that aims at fostering freedom of thought.

From Mike Bloomberg's defense of empowering the choices of parents to Rick Santorum's fear of Liberal education and "indoctrination", the problem with the direction of our education system is the debate around the motivations behind it.

Rush's Response

After being barred from speaking at last week's hearing regarding Obama's policy on contraceptive coverage, Sandra Fluke, Georgetown law student and activist, testified to House Democrats who held a hearing this week regarding the matter. Fluke spoke of the personal cost and importance of employer-covered contraceptives, and the case of her friend who took the pill to treat polycystic ovary syndrom (PCOS).

Radio talk show host Rush Limbaugh's hateful and misogynistic response to Ms. Fluke's testimony was one of accusations; "Feminizi", "slut", "prostitute". Personally I was surprised at the media storm that followed these comments, which were made by a man notorious for hyperbolic, foundationless, and insulting claims. Today Limbaugh offered a statement saying that he was only trying to be humorous, and his "choice of words was not the best".

I remember making similar apologies to my mother during my teenage years: "I'm really sorry I talked back to you, but you really pissed me off and you totally deserved it."

It's refreshing to know that despite the fact that Limbaugh has dismissed himself as a credible political commentator, he is still being held accountable. The issue here isn't just about religious support, sexual freedom, healthcare coverage, or women's rights. Limbaugh's outlandish comments reflect the unfortunate coarsening of political discourse today. Georgetown President John J. DeGioia offered ameaningful insight on the matter in a statement released yesterday.

"In an earlier time, St. Augustine captured the sense of what is required in civil discourse: 'Let us, on both sides, lay aside all arrogance. Let us not, on either side, claim that we have already discovered the truth. Let us seek it together as something which is known to neither of us. For then only may we seek it, lovingly and tranquilly, if there be no bold presumption that it is already discovered and possessed.'

"If we, instead, allow coarseness, anger — even hatred — to stand for civil discourse in America, we violate the sacred trust that has been handed down through the generations beginning with our Founders. The values that hold us together as a people require nothing less than eternal vigilance. This is our moment to stand for the values of civility in our engagement with one another."

In general, media is more polarized than ever and shock-value seems to be ranking highest among our priorities. Despite the fact it has been infiltrated by the likes of Rush Limbaugh and Bill O'Reilly, we cannot give up on the quality of our political discourse, or we risk sacrificing our most effective means of democracy.

Deporting the Potential of the Country

The "smart immigration enforcement", a policy enacted by Obama in 2011, was intended to order Immigration and Customs Enforcement agency (ICE) prosecutors to concentrate their efforts on removing criminals. The year saw a record 396,000 deportations, mostly to Latin American countries. Despite their orders, and although nearly half that number consisted of convicts and felons, ICE prosecuted a remarkable number of students and professionals with no criminal records, many of whom had resided in the United States since childhood.

One example is 18 year old Daniela Palaez of Miami, Florida who was recently ordered by ICE to return to her native Columbia by the 28th of this month. This high school valedictorian who has lived in the U.S. since age 4 has been gaining tremendous regional and national support.

Palaez has a 6.7 GPA, is a student tutor, and leader in her community. That's a hell of a lot more than I can say of myself in high school. I dropped out of the Math and Science magnet program, and only had a high GPA due to the overload of music and performance classes I was enrolled in (easy A's). My best friend however worked her ass off taking AP biology and history, challenged herself with extra-curricular activities, and took on leadership roles. She was an all-American English speaking cheerleader in a Hollister sweatshirt, and also in the country illegally. I went on to an expensive Liberal Arts college then on to business school, where I've finally learned to apply myself. She cannot get a driver's license, job, or private scholarships, and takes a few classes at the community college every semester.

Jonathan Padilla offers a succinct reflection on the results of these two examples and the many more occuring everyday:

Most of the business leaders in Silicon Valley and beyond agree that attracting the best-educated workforce possible makes America's economy not only stronger but also more competitive in the long-term. Our immigration policies however, seem to be limiting the flow of high-skilled workers and our ability to concentrate the best minds in the world here in the United States. Limits on H-1B visas mean companies can't attract all the top-talent they need to keep innovation moving as rapidly as possible and the failure of Congress to act on issues like the DREAM Act means that tens-of-thousands of undocumented immigrants who are tying to invest in a better life through education will not be able to use those skills to make America better.

Rather than exclusively striving to increase manufacturing jobs, the United States should be working to ensure that the ambition and hard work of individuals in this country who want to contribute to the potential of the economy in a meaningful way, are rewarded. I believe The Startup Visa Act and The DREAM Act offer two steps in the right direction.

The Value and Evaluation of Educators

In the wake of the recent release of personal performance data of 18,000 teachers in New York, last night I watched the 2011 film Detachment starring Adrien Brody. Uncanny timing. Detachment tells the story of Henry (Brody), a substitute teacher who suffers every unbearable weight of life, admits failure, yet defies nihilism and tries only to do good by the seemingly hopeless inner-city kids he teaches. The film offers a harrowing look at the education system during No Child Left Behind, and after the suicide of a student, calls to question the roles and obligations of educators to their students.

The New York City Education Department's release of personal performance data not only fundamentally restricts the potential of educators by neglecting to measure many of their important, non-standardized contributions, but its data is ill-gotten on many different levels. Individual teachers' scores reflect the performance of their students in math and english over the five years leading up to the 2009-2010 school year. The quality of the evaluation itself is questioned in The Atlantic, which points to the study's admitted 53 point margin of error in its findings.


Additionally, Joe Hines acknowledges the political disparity of such a release:

Obviously how school's are performing is going to be political, but this seems like Bloomberg's attempt to play politics with the lives of individual teachers. Transparency is important, and maybe releasing the data on schools or school districts themselves would be in the public's interest.

The optics of this decision are terrible, though. New York's billionaire mayor shaming public school teachers to advance his political agenda.

The Times itself looks as if they're going to be publishing the rankings. Is this the proper role for the paper of note? Does publishing the rankings give Bloomberg exactly what he wants?

It will be interesting to see the inevitable ramifications of this outdated analysis shrouded in statistical error, ambiguous methods, political bias, and shame.

No Such Thing as "Over Romanticizing" New York

Who doesn't dream of working in a creative loft space and running into Bill Cunningham on the street. Where else is this possible except New York City? Maybe I've seen You've Got Mail a few too many times (impossible), but nothing sounds better than Autumn in the Big Apple.

The WSJ's Photo's of the Week showcase the dynamic city beautifully. Who cares about the trash or crime, because I'm pretty sure it's just like this:

It's just a bunch of bagels!

Beware of "Monsterating" Women!

Leap Day.

I love holidays, and now thanks to this week's 30 Rock there's a whole new set of traditions for the quadrennial February 29th. Modern Family however chose to mark the day with commentary on the truly controversial issues of today, such as gay men fearing their forties, hypocritical Latinas desperately seeking protection by their men, and the insanity and terror of multiple women in one household all menstruating simultaneously.

The social value of Modern Family is questionable, but I've generally praised the show simply for depicting two cute married men, cross-national adoption, and interracial couples. There's question of whether this only serves to perpetuate stereotypes, but I can usually oversee such issues in the name of comedy and topical entertainment. But I have to say, I'm kind of a bitch when it comes to period jokes.

In the episode "Leap Day", father Phil is excited to celebrate the extra 24 hours by doing something extraordinary and taking the whole family out to a trapeze class. Unfortunately his excitement is quickly squandered by "Satan's trifecta", when his wife Claire and two daughters are all on their period at the same time. The first sign of trouble comes when Claire is seen crying on the couch while watching that Sarah McLaughlin PSA on t.v. The daughters are quick to join her as the boys watch on in terror. How unfortunate that it's a sign of female instability to feel empathy for helpless abused animals.

The men continue their panic, tip-toeing around the subject and plotting their strategy. Phil gives his son and nephew a nice educational talk about how "the woman's actually taking great pains to hide the monster she's become. But if you acknowledge it, just once, the monster appears.” Eventually the subject does come up however as the son accuses all the women of "monsterating". I kid you not, that is the punch of the entire episode.



Claire is cognizant of the games her husband is playing, and admits that "nothing makes someone crazier than going around acting like they're crazy". This idea known as "gaslighting" is a tale as old as time, and one as dangerous to women and relationships as ever. Though in the end all three women understandingly come through to make helpless Phil's dream of trapezing come true (we women tend to give in that way you know).

I'll admit, last night as I was catching up on the latest episode of Glee (I know, I know), I broke out into a full on sob fest at the mere thought of moving to New York and following my dreams. I may have cried myself silly in the privacy of my own studio apartment, but that's not to say that this knowingly somewhat-irrational behavior would ever follow me out into society. Needless to say Modern Family's reductive depiction of period-stricken women who ruin the lives of men around them and whose "brains don't work" was just a silly hyperbolic attempt at the same flat comedy as always.

Write what you know

I was up early enough today to start seeing the morning tweets pour in from all the journalists over on the east coast I follow. Now I'm up late enough that they're up and at it all over again. Twitter is a new consumption for me, as is engagement in any social media really. I've always had an affinity for traditional things like typewriters, doing your dishes by hand, and reading the paper while you're holding an actual piece of paper. I finally gave in however and have to say that it isn't all that bad. I love learning things in real time and feeling a sense of empowerment and engagement by participating. They say you should write what you know, but I can't help but feel as if everything I know is entirely incomprehensive in the scheme of things, and second-hand. I'm starting to actively apply myself in the information age (or are we past that now, who knows), but I'm definitely off to a rocky start.